half spent, half left

Hi Dearest Diary, with wine by my side, what do i want to write about. Well, with wine by my side, i would never like to write about anything better. So let me talk abt posititve things that i have to do invest in mutual funds earn more getter better job that u enjoy more  aim to have a stable relationship with abhishek explore meet people enjoy every moment

Dearest Diary, It's off today owing to ganesh chaturthi. But my help ruksana being a muslim is here for work. M happy about that. So we are going to Lonavala today. My brother will show us places where camping happens, and other places which can be bought or rented. This idea was originated last week when we all had gone to mulshi. Now bhai is taking us out to lonavala to show us places there. I am very interested in this plan of being a holiday home manager, i am concerned how much abhishek is interested in it, coz i need him. 

Dearest Diary, I want to change my job, i want to be out of sales, this doesnt suit me very much, i am an ernest person, i cant think on my toes, i will not make a very good salesperson esp when i dont understand the product that i am selling. so well what are the other sturggles, i am not able to fit in this team, i dont, that's not in my personality, i am just struggling. i hv always been a misfit. so that was kinda bound to happen. One should enjoy their job, which i am not doing here, i wonder if i am made for IT. There are other things that i would enjoy, travelling, sourcing, containers, i should explore other opportunities.  yes coz, i am so close to being thirty. It is high time that i do something that i enjoy.

Dearest Diary, Do you know what is one of the best feelings in this world, to sit with a nicely made cup of tea and write, and the thought beneath the feeling that tea is unlimited. U can get up, make more, drink more, write more. The feeling that this will not end soon. This is unlimited, till my heart is all pleased and it says that's it, no more. To be able to sit this relaxed and and write is a pleasure. And the most important ingredient in this, is this time of the day, dusk, which is my favorite since always. So husband left for Philippines, gardening done sitting near my plants, feeling good, i hope plants are feeling good too. We fertilized them today. Thanks to my sis Seema, coz of her i got inspired to get hands dirty in Gardening, and actually thanks to husband Abhishek as well. He is very hands on with such things. So what lies ahead tomorrow, a few meetings, applying color (may miss) I want to grow old with abhishek, i want to learn about life with him , i wan

Dear Diary, What happened yesterday was not good, things were just getting better and i fought. You cant really blame anyone in yesterday's event, seems everyone had their own story to behave the way they did but i did mistake of what seema di gave me spilling over Abhishek. I really need to focus on how to think logically. Main bahaut 1 direction mein sochti hun and you have some biased notions about your husband, let them go, they were the killer yesterday.

So i was thinking while having tea, i will be writing, that's what i am doing. I am having a nice tea, sitting on sofa besides husband, doing our own things, talking, teasing. that's how life is supposed to be, right? What is missing, kids? may be it's time now, we are 2.5 years old in our marriage. and we are settling in this marriage also. Less fights i mean, more settlement, But i am still not 100% sure, so we need to give 1 more year, before we take that decision. That will alter so much.

Dearest Diary, I am very short of time, hence will keep it brief today. I slept a lot today, didn't wake up when i was supposed to. I have matured a little when it comes to work, i dont take stress like i used to earlier.  I do have regrets about the career mistakes i have made in my life, but that's okay, that is past. There are few things i don't like about my job, This is just my first corporate job, i hope the next ones will not disappoint me as much else i really need to find work for my own. Well that's how my career started courtesy my father. I have seen him work , i have worked besides him. That part of me will never fade away, in fact that impels me to do my own work but what that i need to find and i am not doing that seriously right now. This can be my another career or may be life mistake. Adieu!

How so much i try to keep that away, but office thoughts does consume my mind bandwidth, even when i am at home. I have joined a new team, which is high velocity, product is vast n very technical, so i will have to take some pains, i will hv to be courageous, that comes as part of  making some transition in life. So we have an event in pune day after tomorrow and i have to present some part of my product, rest will be taken care by technical team and i am being jittery abt me having to present, coz this product is very new to me. So think of this priya, suppose u do it, how wud u feel about it 3 or 6 months down the line, proud, right? u will feel why was i scared about it, this can be done and if u dont do, u will feel little ashamed, little downhearted that i didnt take up the challenge. I know ur nature, u get bogged down easily, and start feeling jittery but soon start feeling better when u hv overcomed that feeling. It's all abt perspective. Look from a higher plane,